LOTR Marathon

Since The Hobbit is coming out soon we tried to do a Lord of the Ring extended version movie marathon last night. Apparently a couple of them tried it about five years ago when all three first came out and a few were able to stay awake the entire night. Five years later not one of us made it. We started a little before midnight and made it through the first one okay but everyone passed out during the second one. After a couple hours I woke up to this:

I thought about changing it to the next disc but since everyone around me was asleep I decided not too. I guess that others also woke up but made the same decision. Most people were up around 8am and we decided to continue forward.

At approximately 2 pm we finally finished all three movies. Conclusion? We are getting too old for such activities. I still love the movies though.

His Way, My Way.

The first couple days coming back from home were tough. I missed the comfort of home...with easy access to food...which may or may not have a been a good thing. I missed family. I missed friends. I even missed the cool weather even though it was gloomy. Then I started to research Texas teaching certification requirements and became overwhelmed by all the options and programs. This led me to think about the possibility that I may not return to Seattle after this year and it added to my depression. Combined with the craziness of students after a couple days of break I found myself irritated and annoyed by almost everything and everyone. Basically...like I said...it was tough.

But the Lord knows what He's doing and His timing is perfect. Isaiah 55 spoke to me this week as I prepared for Bible study and the sharings of brothers and sisters were also of great encouragement. A few points:

Seek the Lord while He may be found; Call upon Him while He is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to the Lord, and He will have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,"declares the Lord.  vs 6-8

The Lord is never far and He can always be found but too often I feel that He is nowhere to be found because I am the one that has wandered from my Lord. When things happen in my life that I don't understand I get upset because it makes my life difficult. What I forget is that He doesn't work according to my ways, nor does He think how I think. Actually, I should be thankful that that's the case because we'd all be in trouble if He did things my way. Auntie Catherine shared about how she has been bringing her to dad to rehab and many times the exercises the therapist ask her dad to perform seem silly. It is hard to see the purpose of repeating the same motion time and time again. But, these therapists have a goal in mind and they know that what seems like useless movements right now are actually small steps in training the muscles so that they can carry out their intended function later on. I get frustrated sometimes because I feel that the Lord is allowing the same things to happen time and time again. What I don't see is that this constant repetition is to strengthen my spiritual muscles so that they can function correctly.

"For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return there without watering the earth and making it bear and sprout, and furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater; So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth; It will not return to Me empty, Without accomplishing what I desire, And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it. vs 10-11

Too often I keep my eyes focused on myself...I feel that I'm not growing, or I see that I still struggle with the same things...and I get frustrated and disheartened.  Praise the Lord for the reminder that He doesn't make promises that He can't keep. Rain gives immediate nourishment to plants while snow appears to kills plants. Over time though snow melts and turns into water which can then nourish plants. I want to see immediate results but sometimes God allows snow to fall into my life because it is a growth that can only be seen over time. I do not need to become frustrated because whether it is now or later, rain and snow will both cause the seed to bear and sprout.

Giving Thanks

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances  for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I have seen these verses multiple times this past week. First, it was the memory verse for my first graders last Friday and then it came up in the book Changed Into His Likeness that I was reading. Stephen texted me about it before I left Houston and then I saw it on Facebook this morning. I feel that the Lord is reminding me during this holiday season that I don't rejoice, pray, or give thanks enough for all the ways He has blessed me. The year is quickly coming to an end and it may be easier to rejoice and giving thanks because everyone around us is doing it but my prayer is that even when March comes around and I'm no longer in the "holiday" mood I will remember to always rejoice, to never seize praying, and to praise God for all the circumstances He places in my life.

Victorious Love.

This song has been on my heart all day...thought that I'd share it with you guys.

Jesus, Thine all victorious love
Shed in my heart abroad;
Then shall my feet no longer rove,
Rooted and fixed in God.

O that in me the sacred fire
Might now begin to glow;
Burn up the dross of base desire
And make the mountains flow!

O that it now from Heav’n might fall
And all my sins consume!
Come, Holy Ghost, for Thee I call,
Spirit of burning, come!

Refining fire, go through my heart,
Illuminate my soul;
Scatter Thy life through every part
And sanctify the whole.

Praise the Lord for a wonderful day at work today. It was completely different from how I was feeling last week and I know that it was the Lord answering my prayer because only He is able to refresh us each and every day. 

Finding Beauty in Afflictions.

All of us like sheep have gone astray, Each of us has turned to his own way; But the Lord has caused the iniquity of us all to fall on Him. He was oppressed and He was afflicted; Yet He did not open His mouth; Like a lamb that is led to slaughter, And like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, So he did not open His mouth. Isaiah 53:6-7

This past week has been draining  physically, spiritually, and mentally which is also a reason for my lack of updates. For some reason the joy of going to work vanished this week and was replaced with dread, frustration and hopelessness. Any patience, love, and understanding I thought I once had disappeared and I couldn't help but get upset every time I had to interact with my students. I look at them each day and I'm at a loss of words as to how it is possible that they have learned so little these past three months when I know that their teachers have been working so hard; hopelessness seems to be a very natural and acceptable reaction to this situation and yet I know that this is not the attitude that I should have.

Having this constantly on my mind has understandably affected me physically and mentally but it has also taken a toll on me spiritually. Morning devotions have been difficult and although I attempt to do them, it has been hard to gain anything. When I first came to Houston I guess you could say I felt a sense of renewal in my walk with the Lord because I was in an environment foreign to me. Now that I've gotten "comfortable"  I feel that I have begun to plateau again and maybe that feeling of getting nowhere at work has somehow seeped into my spiritual walk.

Isaiah 53 is a rich chapter and we were supposed to study it last week for Bible study but due to some power problems at the meeting place it was cancelled and pushed back to this week. The Lord gave me two weeks to meditate on this chapter and yet I struggled to gain anything deeper. As I listened to the many sharings last night I was touched by the verses above because even through suffering the Lord was quiet. This is not to say that He did not speak but when He did, His words were full of Life and truth. We are all sheep that have gone astray and yet the perfect Lamb is the one who has taken up all the suffering that should befall on us and He did it quietly. My "afflictions" will never measure up to the afflictions that the Lord went through and yet I am unable to be quiet. I may not always be vocal about it...although I admit that I have been this past week...but I am very loud within before the Lord. Many words that I spoke this past week, not just to my students but also to those around me, have not been full of Life but have been filled with myself. I have been unable to remain quiet and because of that unrest the Lord has not been able to speak to me.

The Lord was not a person who stood out in appearance but His life was one of beauty. Many times we look for the Lord in beautiful and attractive things but then we miss out on the true beauty that the Lord wants to show us because we view them as plain or even undesirable. Working at Blackshear is not beautiful or attractive...we are actually unable to find substitute teachers because no one wants to come here...and yet I've realized that the Lord wants to show me something beautiful through this experience. I need to continue to be diligent in the task that He has set before me and I need to be reminded once again that I cannot survive a single moment outside of His presence.

Good to Know.

Came home the other day to find this attached to our front door:

Thanks for the heads up.

Living an easy life.

"But he who listens to me shall live securely And will be at ease from the dread of evil."
-Proverbs 1:33

The Lord has not promised that if we listen to Him our life will be easy but He has said that we will be able to live securely. So often we feel that our lives should be easy because that is how the Lord blesses us. We pursue after the enjoyments of life but what we find is that many times our obedience to His voice doesn't result in an "easy" life because it requires us setting aside our own will and ideas. What we do find is that when we are able to listen we are able to live a secure life before Him because we see our obedience leads to protection from the evilness of this world. Praise the Lord for the reminder this morning that as I start off the day I would not pray for an easy day but that I may give Him thanks that I can live securely in His presence as long as I am sensitive to His leading in everything I do.