LOTR Marathon

Since The Hobbit is coming out soon we tried to do a Lord of the Ring extended version movie marathon last night. Apparently a couple of them tried it about five years ago when all three first came out and a few were able to stay awake the entire night. Five years later not one of us made it. We started a little before midnight and made it through the first one okay but everyone passed out during the second one. After a couple hours I woke up to this:

I thought about changing it to the next disc but since everyone around me was asleep I decided not too. I guess that others also woke up but made the same decision. Most people were up around 8am and we decided to continue forward.

At approximately 2 pm we finally finished all three movies. Conclusion? We are getting too old for such activities. I still love the movies though.

His Way, My Way.

The first couple days coming back from home were tough. I missed the comfort of home...with easy access to food...which may or may not have a been a good thing. I missed family. I missed friends. I even missed the cool weather even though it was gloomy. Then I started to research Texas teaching certification requirements and became overwhelmed by all the options and programs. This led me to think about the possibility that I may not return to Seattle after this year and it added to my depression. Combined with the craziness of students after a couple days of break I found myself irritated and annoyed by almost everything and everyone. Basically...like I said...it was tough.

But the Lord knows what He's doing and His timing is perfect. Isaiah 55 spoke to me this week as I prepared for Bible study and the sharings of brothers and sisters were also of great encouragement. A few points:

Seek the Lord while He may be found; Call upon Him while He is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to the Lord, and He will have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,"declares the Lord.  vs 6-8

The Lord is never far and He can always be found but too often I feel that He is nowhere to be found because I am the one that has wandered from my Lord. When things happen in my life that I don't understand I get upset because it makes my life difficult. What I forget is that He doesn't work according to my ways, nor does He think how I think. Actually, I should be thankful that that's the case because we'd all be in trouble if He did things my way. Auntie Catherine shared about how she has been bringing her to dad to rehab and many times the exercises the therapist ask her dad to perform seem silly. It is hard to see the purpose of repeating the same motion time and time again. But, these therapists have a goal in mind and they know that what seems like useless movements right now are actually small steps in training the muscles so that they can carry out their intended function later on. I get frustrated sometimes because I feel that the Lord is allowing the same things to happen time and time again. What I don't see is that this constant repetition is to strengthen my spiritual muscles so that they can function correctly.

"For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return there without watering the earth and making it bear and sprout, and furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater; So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth; It will not return to Me empty, Without accomplishing what I desire, And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it. vs 10-11

Too often I keep my eyes focused on myself...I feel that I'm not growing, or I see that I still struggle with the same things...and I get frustrated and disheartened.  Praise the Lord for the reminder that He doesn't make promises that He can't keep. Rain gives immediate nourishment to plants while snow appears to kills plants. Over time though snow melts and turns into water which can then nourish plants. I want to see immediate results but sometimes God allows snow to fall into my life because it is a growth that can only be seen over time. I do not need to become frustrated because whether it is now or later, rain and snow will both cause the seed to bear and sprout.

Giving Thanks

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances  for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I have seen these verses multiple times this past week. First, it was the memory verse for my first graders last Friday and then it came up in the book Changed Into His Likeness that I was reading. Stephen texted me about it before I left Houston and then I saw it on Facebook this morning. I feel that the Lord is reminding me during this holiday season that I don't rejoice, pray, or give thanks enough for all the ways He has blessed me. The year is quickly coming to an end and it may be easier to rejoice and giving thanks because everyone around us is doing it but my prayer is that even when March comes around and I'm no longer in the "holiday" mood I will remember to always rejoice, to never seize praying, and to praise God for all the circumstances He places in my life.

Victorious Love.

This song has been on my heart all day...thought that I'd share it with you guys.

Jesus, Thine all victorious love
Shed in my heart abroad;
Then shall my feet no longer rove,
Rooted and fixed in God.

O that in me the sacred fire
Might now begin to glow;
Burn up the dross of base desire
And make the mountains flow!

O that it now from Heav’n might fall
And all my sins consume!
Come, Holy Ghost, for Thee I call,
Spirit of burning, come!

Refining fire, go through my heart,
Illuminate my soul;
Scatter Thy life through every part
And sanctify the whole.

Praise the Lord for a wonderful day at work today. It was completely different from how I was feeling last week and I know that it was the Lord answering my prayer because only He is able to refresh us each and every day. 

Finding Beauty in Afflictions.

All of us like sheep have gone astray, Each of us has turned to his own way; But the Lord has caused the iniquity of us all to fall on Him. He was oppressed and He was afflicted; Yet He did not open His mouth; Like a lamb that is led to slaughter, And like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, So he did not open His mouth. Isaiah 53:6-7

This past week has been draining  physically, spiritually, and mentally which is also a reason for my lack of updates. For some reason the joy of going to work vanished this week and was replaced with dread, frustration and hopelessness. Any patience, love, and understanding I thought I once had disappeared and I couldn't help but get upset every time I had to interact with my students. I look at them each day and I'm at a loss of words as to how it is possible that they have learned so little these past three months when I know that their teachers have been working so hard; hopelessness seems to be a very natural and acceptable reaction to this situation and yet I know that this is not the attitude that I should have.

Having this constantly on my mind has understandably affected me physically and mentally but it has also taken a toll on me spiritually. Morning devotions have been difficult and although I attempt to do them, it has been hard to gain anything. When I first came to Houston I guess you could say I felt a sense of renewal in my walk with the Lord because I was in an environment foreign to me. Now that I've gotten "comfortable"  I feel that I have begun to plateau again and maybe that feeling of getting nowhere at work has somehow seeped into my spiritual walk.

Isaiah 53 is a rich chapter and we were supposed to study it last week for Bible study but due to some power problems at the meeting place it was cancelled and pushed back to this week. The Lord gave me two weeks to meditate on this chapter and yet I struggled to gain anything deeper. As I listened to the many sharings last night I was touched by the verses above because even through suffering the Lord was quiet. This is not to say that He did not speak but when He did, His words were full of Life and truth. We are all sheep that have gone astray and yet the perfect Lamb is the one who has taken up all the suffering that should befall on us and He did it quietly. My "afflictions" will never measure up to the afflictions that the Lord went through and yet I am unable to be quiet. I may not always be vocal about it...although I admit that I have been this past week...but I am very loud within before the Lord. Many words that I spoke this past week, not just to my students but also to those around me, have not been full of Life but have been filled with myself. I have been unable to remain quiet and because of that unrest the Lord has not been able to speak to me.

The Lord was not a person who stood out in appearance but His life was one of beauty. Many times we look for the Lord in beautiful and attractive things but then we miss out on the true beauty that the Lord wants to show us because we view them as plain or even undesirable. Working at Blackshear is not beautiful or attractive...we are actually unable to find substitute teachers because no one wants to come here...and yet I've realized that the Lord wants to show me something beautiful through this experience. I need to continue to be diligent in the task that He has set before me and I need to be reminded once again that I cannot survive a single moment outside of His presence.

Good to Know.

Came home the other day to find this attached to our front door:

Thanks for the heads up.

Living an easy life.

"But he who listens to me shall live securely And will be at ease from the dread of evil."
-Proverbs 1:33

The Lord has not promised that if we listen to Him our life will be easy but He has said that we will be able to live securely. So often we feel that our lives should be easy because that is how the Lord blesses us. We pursue after the enjoyments of life but what we find is that many times our obedience to His voice doesn't result in an "easy" life because it requires us setting aside our own will and ideas. What we do find is that when we are able to listen we are able to live a secure life before Him because we see our obedience leads to protection from the evilness of this world. Praise the Lord for the reminder this morning that as I start off the day I would not pray for an easy day but that I may give Him thanks that I can live securely in His presence as long as I am sensitive to His leading in everything I do.

Wasting Paper.

I don't think that I've ever fully understand what it meant to waste paper until I started at Blackshear, the amount of paper that this school goes through is incredible. I mean, I get that having 22 students per class with a total of 18 classes requires a lot of paper when printing out worksheets and such but what I'm talking about is the amount of unnecessary copies that are made every day. There is one printer on the second floor that all the computers on campus can print to and every time I try to print something I always have to first fix the printer because of a paper jam, and then I have to wait 5-10 minutes before my stuff actually prints out because there are a whole bunch of printing jobs before mine that teachers never bothered to deal with.

Today, I tried to print out some story problems to use with the third graders and of course I find that the printer is jammed. I spent about 10 minutes trying to find the jam...I took apart every part of the printer that I could but it still said that the printer was jammed. Just as I was getting frustrated a hymn came into my mind:

This world is not my home, I'm just a passing through

My treasures are laid up, somewhere beyond the blue,

The angels beckon me from heaven's open door,

And I can't feel at home in this world anymore.

O Lord, you know I have no friend like you,

If heaven's not my home, O Lord what will i do?

The angels beckon me from heaven's open door,

And I can't feel at home in this world anymore.

Really, this seemed like a weird hymn to pop into my head at the time but as I kept humming it I realized how much of a blessing it is that my home is not in this world. I was getting all worked up about the broken printer but I'm thankful that my life is not build upon things so easily broken like a printer, I have a hope that is eternal. As soon as this thought came into my mind I was no longer upset about the printer. It didn't get fixed right away but the process of trying to find the problem became more fun than annoying. I never did find the jammed paper but I did manage to get it working again and I'm pretty sure that I fed in an entire ream of paper...yes, 500 pages...before my pages printed but I no longer allowed it to affect my entire day. 

What was another lesson I learned from this experience? Never try to print things in a hurry on a Monday morning because you will probably spend an hour waiting. Apparently, teachers print out their entire lesson plan for the next week on Fridays and when they don't print right away they don't try to fix the printer; instead, they keep sending the document to the printer until they give up. Then, someone like me decides to fix it and five copies of the same lesson plan comes out...each document being 20-30 pages long. I felt horrible watching all that paper getting wasted so I've decided to bring some home to use as scratch paper or to just print the my student's activities on them...the other side is still usable anyway. 

Brrrr....

I wasn't quite sure what to expect when I heard that the cold front was coming to Houston but I experienced it yesterday. We had a high in the 60s and it overcast and slightly windy the entire day. When I woke up this morning I didn't want to get out of bed because it was freezing. I finally got up and went downstairs to check the thermostat and saw that my apartment was 67 degrees...it felt the same inside my apartment was it was outside. For some reason I remember that 67 in Seattle felt comfortable but I wore a long sleeve shirt and a sweater just to stay warm today, I'm not sure what that means for me when I do go back to Seattle in a couple weeks. haha

Last night we had a combined sharing meeting with the high school group on the topic of our relationship with God and since I was asked to facilitate a group with Jill I've been spending time before the Lord reflecting upon this topic. The three subtopics were morning devotion, preparing for Bible study, and godly time management. None of these topic were new to me but I feel as if I've gotten a new perspective of godly time management since I've started working. Maybe it's the fact that Stephanie chose to call it "godly time management" but I've never made a real connection between time management and my spiritual condition before the Lord; to me time management in college meant being efficient with my time so that I'd be able to complete the tasks before me...which included reading the Bible and praying. Now that I'm working I'm at work for eight hours every day and then I'm able to leave work at work and come home  It's nice because once I'm home I don't have homework to do or exams to study for but I've also developed this attitude where I feel that I've earned the evening to relax because I truly am exhausted. Plus, there are the regular meetings that I attend throughout the week so any time that I have to myself I feel that I have earned the right to do whatever it is I want...which usually involves reading blogs and catching up on TV shows. Days can go by like this before I realize that I still haven't had time to prepare for Bible study or that I haven't progressed any further in reading The Normal Christian Life.

Preparing for this discussion reminded me that my attitude is wrong, ALL of my time belongs to the Lord and what I do with my time is a reflection of how much of His life is in me.

Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
Ephesians 5: 15-17

May the Lord once again place a sense of urgency within me so that I won't allow time to dwindle away; that even my time of "relaxing" may have eternal value.

This is why I teach.

Many times over the last month or so I've wondered why I chose to teach in a program like that one I'm in; there are plenty of "easier" schools for me to get involved with. Today reminded me why I enjoy these challenges as disheartening as they may be at times. Since the kids have started to get restless and are constantly asking to work with other tutors we decided to use a rotation system during our tutoring blocks so that they'd get a chance to work with all of the tutors. A couple people were skeptical about how it would work because our time with each group is short and transitions tend to take up time; but, I'm happy to say that the kids proved us wrong. The kids that usually have a hard time focusing were actually the most productive it was exciting. haha I worked with rounding to the nearest tens at my station and it was amazing to see it click with some of the ones that tend to lose focus. It was cool because not only did I get super excited but I could see that they were excited too. They were trying to act like they didn't care but I could tell that they were trying really hard not to smile when they got the problems right. I go to work each day without any idea of how the day is going to play out but it's always wonderful when my students chose to learn; this is what makes all the painful days worth it and this is why I chose to teach.

Commit your works.

Commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established. Proverbs 16:3

As I spent time before the Lord this morning this verse caught my attention because it is something I've been struggling to do. Part of me has been reluctant to seek before the Lord regarding my plans for next year because I am afraid of what He may reveal to me. I know that once I place this decision into His hands He will give me an answer that I need to obey. I'm running short on time because I need to get to work but my prayer is that He may continue to soften my heart so that I will be willing to submit my will under His. I know that He has a plan for me and I know that I need to commit all that I do into His hands but I need Him to break my stiff-necked nature so that I'm willing to humble myself. At Bible study on Friday we had fellowship  about making decisions with eternal value. Although His way for me may not necessarily be easy for me to follow at first I know that my willingness to submit to His way is the only way to gain anything of eternal value. Hopefully we can all learn to commit our works, both the big and small things, into His hands so that His plan may be established in our lives. What a beautiful testimony that would be before the Lord.

Wine Tasting.

Last Monday I went to my first wine tasting class ever. The few times that I've had wine I haven't been a huge fan but since this was for Jamie's birthday I decided I'd go and maybe taste wine that I'd actually enjoy. Jamie and Susan are both wine lovers so this was totally their kind of a class. The class was focused on French wine and it was fun learning about the wine from different regions of France. The instructor was friendly and knowledgeable but honestly everything was so new to me that I didn't understand a lot of what he was saying...especially when it came to being able to taste various elements of the wine. Susan was able to distinguish some of the elements like apple and cloves but all I could say was whether or not I liked them. haha We tasted six types of wine...starting with two white wines, a rose, and then three red wines along with handouts that were helpful because it told us what was in the wine and what it would be paired well with. Surprisingly, there were actually a few that I enjoyed so I'll be sure to be on the lookout for those if I ever need to buy wine. haha

The girls at the end of the class.

Afterwards we headed over to Emily's place and had a pretty late dinner. Emily and Susan spent the afternoon setting it up and it was beautiful...pinterest worthy. I loved the lights and the autumn theme, it was one of the few evenings where I was able to enjoy being outside since I've arrived in Houston. The temperature was perfect and the stars were out...it truly was a wonderful evening full of delicious food and getting to know the other girls. 

Happy Birthday Jamie!

Words for the weary.

The Lord God has given me the tongue of disciples, that I may know how to sustain the weary one with a word. He awakens Me morning by morning, He awakens My ear to listen as a disciple. 
Isaiah 50:4

Thursday was a rough day at work. I'm not sure what happened Wednesday night but the entire 4th grade class was not themselves on Thursday. Three of my students cried and I had to pull two students out of class to have a chat about respect. In our tutoring classroom I sit in one corner and due to various reasons the tutor that works diagonally across the room from me has little respect from the students she works with so her group is often quite disruptive to the rest of us. On Thursday one of her students actually told her to shut up when she asked him to do something and then he kicked her under the table and accused her of kicking him. I was shocked by the level of disrespect but after being here for the time that I've been here I shouldn't be too surprised.

Waking up Friday morning  was difficult but during my time of devotion I read Isaiah 50 and verse 4 became an encouragement to me. It truly is the Lord that sustains us each and every moment and it is He that awakens us morning by morning. The more that I talk to my co-workers and students the more burdened I feel to pray for these kids. Most of them have little control over the environment they're growing up in and many of them are victims of poor choices made by their parents/guardians. My prayer is that I may have a well-instructed tongue so that the words I speak may sustain the weary. Throughout the day there are many words that I want to say to both the kids and to my co-workers but I realize that they may not all be words that can help to sustain the weary, I need Him to awaken my ears so that I may listen and speak the words He gives.

Here are pictures to recap parts of this weekend:

My roommate got engaged this weekend! Don't have the group pics yet but here's us waiting/hiding.

Typical Solomon.

 Crunchy chicken: nut-crusted, provolone, buttermilk ranch, pretzel bun

Quinoa: corn, tomato, butternut squash, chimichurri

Tuscan Kale: golden raisins, toasted pine nuts, parmesan

Jazz Festival. A nice way to relax after a busy week at work.

To end a busy Saturday we had a engagement celebration dinner at Peking Cuisine but I was too hungry and forgot to take pictures. The food was delicious though, trust me. 

Fattening Weekend

It has been a busy weekend of eating and playing. It started out Saturday morning with a baby shower for a sister at church as well as for Stephanie. I failed and forgot to take picture of the cute set up but I did get a picture of the diaper cake Susan made for Stephanie.

It was nice to hear the advice that older sisters had to give about raising children and although I don't see myself with kids for a while longer I will definitely meditate upon what was shared for future purposes.

After that, I attended a gathering that the Chinese Gospel Group had to celebrate the mid-autumn festival. I went because a sister kept inviting me to attend and I felt bad about rejecting her previous invitations to events before. Even though I was reluctant to go at first because I didn't know any of them and because it would all be in Chinese, I praise the Lord that I went because it was encouraging to see and hear the testimonies of  brothers and sisters with a background quite different from mine. Although I didn't feel like we had much in common we were still able to fellowship because we shared a common Life. Of course there was also a lot of good food, it's amazing how much food the sisters are able to produce in a short amount of time.

 This is not even half of the choices of food there but I was still stuffed from the baby shower earlier in the day that this was all I could manage to try.

Sunday was a dumpling making party with the YES group. Spring is a pro when it come to Asian cuisine so we try to get her to cook for us whenever we can. Last time we got together to make cong you bing and this time it was dumplings. We made the standard chives and pork dumpling but we also decided to be adventurous and try to make Korean kimchi dumpling. Spring did the important part of putting in the sauces so I still don't really know what she put in there but at least I know the other ingredients used. haha The kimchi dumplings turned out yummy but I think that we squeezed out too much of the liquid so there wasn't much kimchi taste. Oh well, we can try again next time. 

Spring hard at work mixing the ingredients together.

 Girls hard at work wrapping the dumplings while....

 The boys are busy playing video games. Typical.

Don't worry though cause we put them to work afterwards. 

I'm happy to say that I still feel fine with no signs of food poisoning. The kitchen was a complete mess afterwards though, I should've taken a picture of it but we were too busy trying to clean it up so we could go home. Waking up this morning I could feel the food from this weekend still sitting in my stomach. As much fun as this weekend was I'm ready to go back to my regular eating habits and hopefully lose the couple pounds I'm pretty sure I've gained. :) 

Teacher's Nightmare

As a kid going on field trips were always the highlight of going to school because it was a time to relax from the normal school schedule and hang out with friends. Now, as a teacher, field trips have become one of my worst nightmares...at least it is with this fourth grade class. This past week we a crazy one: training on Monday, student eye exams on Tuesday, early dismissal on Wednesday, and then a field trip to the Museum of Natural Science on Thursday (my third time there).

Anyway, to put it quite simply it was embarrassing to be on the trip with these kids. They were unable to listen to the people at the museum and would wander off and try to do their own thing. The poor lady at the end of the tour looked to me and said, "Thank you for being here. If you weren't here I'm not sure what I would've done." I'm used to getting this kind of behavior from them so I've learned to be very firm with them but I'm pretty sure that these volunteers at the museum have very little contact with kids from this background. One of the groups had this lady that looked like she was in her 70s...she could barely walk up the stairs without getting out of breathe, there was no way those boys were going to wait around and listen to her. We were only at the museum for two hours but all of us teachers were more than ready to leave because it was exhausting keeping them on track. The rest of the day was a joke because the kids didn't want to learn and we didn't feel like forcing anything anymore.

Besides that the kids have been pretty good. I don't know what it is with these group of kids but the boys love giving us hugs. I'm not a hug person at all and they're at an awkward height right now so the situation is slightly uncomfortable. lol They also have this weird thing where they call us mama so instead of calling me Ms. Wu they'll call me their mama Wu...which is weird but whatever, I just ignore it and move on. I've also noticed that quite of a few of the kids in tutoring don't actually need the tutoring, they just need to learn to focus long enough on a standardized test to do well. I think that it's a combination of the lack of ability to focus and the fact that they don't care that causes them to perform poorly on a test that they could do well in. I'm still in the process of trying to figure out how to work on that part during the tutoring time.

Unto His Glory in Christ

Romans 8:29-30 For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren; and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified.

1 Peter 5:10 After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.

These two verses have been on my mind since Sunday after they were mentioned in the message so I figured that I'd just share a little of what's been on my mind.. I remember getting excited when the brother shared this verse because we had memorized it and I was able to recite the verse without having to turn to it. haha Sometimes I wonder if I actually remember any of the verses we memorize and it was the Lord's way of showing me that having His word in memory truly is a precious thing. 

The idea of God's glory is something I've been hearing a lot recently and it has caused me to reflect upon what it means to see God's glory and to be brought into His glory. For some reason I have always thought of it as some high spiritual doctrine that was too hard for me to grasp but I have come to understand that although it may be something I am not yet able to fully grasp, I am able to get a glimpse of what it means to live in His glory.

I've come to realize that glory is simply the manifestation of the nature of God. Wherever the presence of God is able to dwell, there His glory can be found. As the people of God we should long after His presence daily so that we can continuously live in His glory. Romans tells us that we have been predestined for His glory but 1 Peter tells us that we have also been predestined for affliction. Why is it that we must suffer in order to be brought into His glory? It is because we are unable to see His glory when our old self is still present. The brother used an interesting example that I'd like to share. He shared about the transformation of the caterpillar into a butterfly. You can throw a caterpillar into the air and hope that it will remain there but we all know that it will fall. Even if you pick it up and throw it higher into the air, it will not suddenly become a butterfly and remain in the air. In order for that caterpillar to fly it must first die and a new life must arise; the life of the butterfly. It is the same for us. We can hope to live in glory but when our old life is still alive we will only fall. It is only through the lessons of the cross and the afflictions that we go through that our old life can die and our new life can arise, that is why we must be predestined for affliction. Without affliction we will not come to see that our old life must die. Every affliction comes with a purpose and they are all hand-picked and appointed by God. 

This is a comfort to me because I know that no suffering can enter my life without first receiving the approval of God. When we choose to reject the lessons of affliction we are actually missing out on the opportunity to fulfill the purpose of that affliction in our life. When we are able to accept the lessons God teaches us through affliction, the earthen vessel that we live in can be broken and the inner man can be lived out. I feel that this is something we all know but I have to admit that each time affliction arises my outer man seems to win. May we allow God to sift and shake us so that we may become more rooted in Him and be brought into His glory. At the same time we do praise our Lord because He has already promised that He will perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish us in His glory, we need only to submit ourselves before Him. 

Outer Rice Loop.

This was supposed to get posted yesterday but I never got around to finishing it up. 

Fall weather has finally arrived in Houston which means that walking around outside at 3 in the afternoon isn't too unbearable. With the cooling of the weather I also decided to venture out running again but this time around Rice. I was worried about how long I would last since I haven't ran in more than a month but I managed to do 6 miles. I was surprised that I wasn't feeling tired but decided to stop because I was getting a blister on my foot and I'm still trying to take it easy with my bad knees.

Back in college I would always go running whenever I felt stressed because it allowed me to clear my head and I've had quite a bit on my mind this week so being able to run this morning was refreshing. The YES group at HCA has a group of people that run each Saturday morning around Rice and I haven't been going because of the weather. I told myself last night that I'd see how I was feeling this morning before deciding if I'd go running. Anyway, I woke up this morning and decided to go but I wasn't able to make it in time to meet up with YES runners so I ran on my own. Plus, I didn't want to risk embarrassing myself if I couldn't make it around the loop. It was interesting because each time I thought about slowing down I ran into people that I knew and it helped to keep me going. Even though there were many people running on the trail it was when I ran into people I knew that I became encouraged. Part of it was because I didn't want them to think I was lazy but at the same time it was nice to see a familiar face and exchange words of encouragement. This got me thinking about how thankful I am to have brothers and sisters running this race with me. Sometimes I do feel that I am on this journey alone, especially being here in a foreign environment with people I am not yet familiar with, and even though I'm surrounded by people of this world they are unable to encourage me. Yet, right when I feel that I am ready to stop, the Lord places people and events in my life to show me that I'm not alone.

Hello sweaty me

I'll end this post with a verse that struck me from Isaiah 49, the chapter we studied this past Friday at Bible study: 

"I will make all My mountains a road,
And My highways will be raised up."

Our God is all powerful and He is the sovereign one. He is able to make the highest mountains in our lives into flat roads and He is able to bring our lives into a higher way when we feel low. Knowing this, we should shout for joy and rejoice all our days because we do not live this life alone but we have Christ as our great comforter through all afflictions. 

Lessons learned these past few weeks.

Sorry I realize that it has been a while since I last wrote a post, each day just goes by so quickly now that it is hard to find time to sit down and attempt to put together some coherent thoughts. School is in full swing now and I'm enjoying it despite the many ups and downs that occur throughout the day. Some days the kids are wonderful and we get through everything and some days I feel like I spend the whole time just getting them to sit down and not mess around with each other. Still, I praise the Lord for putting me in this situation because He is continuing to show me how much I am like these 8/9 year olds.

There is this one particular boy that stands out because he reminds me so much of myself, not in the academic way but in my spiritual walk. On Wednesday of last week he was having a particularly bad day and just did not want to come to class. He hadn't behaved the previous day (Tuesday) so his parents got a phone call from the teacher and I guess that he had gotten grounded. Anyway, he was super grumpy and kept saying he didn't want to come and that he didn't need to extra help because he already knew everything. He believed that he was one of the smartest kids in the class. The truth is, he is smart and he is able to understand more than some of the other kids I work with but he doesn't actually understand everything. With this attitude of "I already know" he is preventing himself from learning the things he doesn't know. I feel that that is often my attitude in my spiritual walk, I feel like I already know so much and I've become proud of my head knowledge that I don't allow the Lord to make them a reality in my life. Being blessed with the environment I've grown up with it is easy to think that we are "experienced" and "smart" Christians, that we don't feel like we need to learn anything else when that's actually far from the truth. 

The other thing I've seen in this kids is their inability to sit and listen. Again, that reminds me of myself before the Lord. How difficult it can be sometimes to sit before the Lord and listen, especially in the morning. Sometimes I sit down, open the Bible, and quickly find myself thinking about other things. I may be seated physically but mentally I have become unfocused, preventing the Lord to reveal anything to me. The boy that I was just talking about, with the bad day on Wednesday, came back on Thursday completely different. He was very attentive and finished everything I assigned him. At the end of the hour he said something that made me laugh. He said, "You know, when I'm good the time goes by so much faster." How true it is that when we are able to quiet ourselves before the Lord and open ourselves up to Him the time seems to fly by. When we struggle with Him minutes feel like hours and we still aren't able to gain anything. I thank the Lord that He continues to show me my many impurities and pray for a pliable heart before Him each and every day. 

On a side note, I've realized the power of prayer each and every morning. Even though the days may not go as smoothly as I'd like, but when I am able to start off my day by placing it in His hands, even when it is a rough day I am still at peace before Him because I know He is in control. 

Listening.

Praise the Lord I finally have internet! It was hard not being to have access to the internet all week but I made it. My first week of school went well and I'm excited to start working with them on a more individual level. I actually got the opportunity take over the class for the bit and go over their math homework yesterday as the teacher was giving out reading tests. What did I learn from the experience? I need a better idea of what 2nd/3rd graders understand. haha I tried to add a little complexity to some of the problems...different ways to look at it or other ways to solve it...and the teacher had to tell me to move on because it was too hard for them. Oh well, at least I got the experience of being in front of the classroom on my own.

Last night at Bible Study we studied Isaiah 46 and as I was mediating on this chapter I noticed that the Lord says a phrase twice, "Listen to me". This phrase caught my attention because it is something I've noticed while being in the classrooms this week. It doesn't matter how young or old we are, we all have a hard time listening. Since it was the first week the teacher spent a lot of time going over procedures and emphasizing the importance of following directions. It was amazing to see how we could go over each direction step by step, have them repeat it, and still have half the class mess up. The teacher was usually clear about what she expected at each step and yet they had such a hard time following the most simple directions.

Watching them reminded me of myself before the Lord. It's very easy to say that we need to listen to the Lord yet when it comes to practice it is so difficult. The Lord always gives us very clear and simple directions and yet we have a hard time following them. We are a stubborn-minded people and so often we think that we only need a listen to a part of the directions or that we know a better way to do things so we do as we like. In the end though the kids get in trouble and we also find ourselves in situations that are easily avoidable if we just listen and obey.

The Lord has already promised that He will carry us if only we would choose to listen to Him. Whenever we try to carrying our own burdens we find ourselves quickly weighed down but as soon as we allow Him to carry us we are set free. Thank the Lord that our God is so patient and loving towards us, even when we fail to follow His directions He corrects us through His love. May we all have a listening ear and an obediant heart before the Lord.

First Day of School.

I remember that the night before the first day of school I would always be too excited to sleep well...I would be going through my mental checklist over and over again making sure I didn't forget anything. Last night was no different except this time I was anxious about being a teacher instead of being the student.

There are a couple ways to describe my first day at B Elementary but none of them remind me of how elementary school was for me. My first impression was that little black kids are so cute, especially when they're in their uniforms! The pre-K and Kinder kids were so tiny and many were carrying around backpacks too big for them. I really wanted to take pictures but we're not allowed to unless they're for classroom purposes. I used to hate uniforms...but they really do save one the trouble of having to worry about what to wear. By the way, I am in need of having to go shopping because I don't have enough business casual clothing. I miss the good ole days when I could just throw on my sweats and a t-shirt and head out for school. :p 

I spent the day in Ms. M's classroom and all I can say about it is that it was intense. We spent all morning going over procedures...the breakfast routine, fire drill, how to line up, bathroom routine...we probably went through each procedure 3-4 times. Ms M is this small black lady but she's scary...I wasn't even a student and I found her intimidating. lol She was yelling at the kids and calling them out on everything. This poor boy was trying to tie his shoe and she made him take off his shoes and place them in the front of the classroom so he wouldn't get distracted. Today was the first day of school and she already sent 4 kids out into the hallway, one boy to time out for not being prepared with an answer to a question, and two boys to the middle of the classroom to stand for almost an hour. I've heard that her kids are always really good and it's obvious why.

These poor kids also don't have recess. They have an hour of auxiliary where they might have P.E. or art but even that is very structured. When I went to go check up on them they were all in rows under the cover doing jumping jacks and stretches...it reminded me of a military camp. Maybe it's what these kids needs because of their background but I'm definitely not used to it. It'll be interesting to see how the rest of the week plays out, I'm pretty excited for teaching to begin so I can start doing something.

A Whole New World.

My task at work this past week was to get settled and prepare for school to start on Monday. As I was walking down the halls I was caught off guard because people immediately greeted me by saying, "Hi, Ms. Wu" without me ever introducing myself. I quickly realized why. I am the only Asian person on campus...staff and students included. There are only three other Caucasians...my two colleague tutors and the school nurse.We had an open house on Thursday and none of the parents/students knew how to interact with me. lol I'm pretty sure that I'm the only Asian person they've seen in the area for a loooong time.

My school, B Elementary, is in the Third Ward, aka the ghetto. Basically all the students live below the poverty line and many of them are exposed to things at home that I cannot even imagine. I'm not sure what I've gotten myself into but I know that this year is going to be a year of challenges. The demographics at the school are 80% Black and 20% Hispanic. Less than 40% of the students are passing any subject on the standardized tests and many of them have been retained. Being in this kind of an environment I am reminded of how blessed I've been growing up.

Just so you guys have an idea of what I'm doing here, I am part of an organization called the Apollo 20. It started out four years ago when the Superintendent of HISD (Houston Independent School District) received a letter from the state saying four of his high schools were on the border of being shut down because of extremely poor test results. A couple months later he received another letter saying that five of his middle schools were about to be closed down. As he brainstormed on what he could do, the Apollo program began to take shape. Eventually they added 11 elementary schools so there are now 20 school involved. This program is part of a research project through Harvard Ed and they've received a grant for three years. This is now the third year and because the results weren't extraordinary last year with the implementation of a new standardized test, there is a lot of pressure for dramatic improvement in test scores. I went to a Apollo 20 rally on Wednesday and they didn't sugarcoat it for us...we have to a tough year ahead of us.

I leave you with a few pictures of my classroom...it was hard to get it all.

No Longer Homeless.

As I am typing I have oreo stuffed chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven. I was hoping to use mini oreos but apparently everyone knew about the 99 cents deal at Krogers because they were completely out by the time I got there. Oh well, humongous cookies it is I guess.

On another note...I finally have a place to live. It was a long and somewhat frustrating ordeal but I'm thankful that God allowed it to be a not so smooth process. Erin and I were able to find an apartment pretty soon after I got here; rent was $945/month for 1290 sq ft., a basketball and tennis court, a pool, and the guy was in a hurry to move out so he was offering to pay us $500 upfront when we signed the lease. It was a great deal and I thought that this must be what God was giving to me. The only problem was that we wouldn't be able to move in until the end of the month. I'd already been staying at the Yong's place for a week or so and I didn't want to trouble them any longer so I had to figure out where I could stay until I could moved in. Then I was reminded of a friend that lived around the area so I asked if I could crash at her place for a couple days, she said yes. I thought that things couldn't get any better.

Yea, well God had other plans for me and shortly after we turned in our application we found out that something went wrong with the guy's mortgage at the condo he had just purchased so he wouldn't move out of the apartment until Sept 27th. This left us with two options, we could either wait until the end of September to move in or we could move on to another place. We decided to start over but since Rice and UH are both starting in the next week or so apartments were being rented out fast and we had a hard time finding places within my price range. Then on Wednesday we went to look at a townhouse and we arrived with checkbook in hand ready to make a deposit if the place was decent. It was. But, the landlords weren't willing to accept our offer because they had two other people coming later that they and I think that wanted to see if they could get a better contract from them. I left feeling really frustrated at God for making we wait so long to find a place.

At this time I was reminded by a friend of a very simple lesson that the Lord was trying to teach me, to place my trust in Him. It's a simple idea yet a difficult one. I was reminded of the saying, "Either He is the Lord of all, or He is not our Lord at all" and of the theme of WCCC this year that Christ is to be all and in all. These two phrases humbled me immediately because I realized that all this time I had not allowed Him to be the Lord of all in my life. It has only been a couple weeks since WCCC and God gave me a simple test of whether or not I had come to understand what I had heard and it was clear that I had not. So often we hear these ideas and phrases and we agree with them in our head, yet we fail to make them a reality in our lives.

I thank God for giving me this bump in the road so early on in my arrival to Houston because I know that there will be many more to come. The school I will be working in will not be in an easy environment, many of these students come from broken families and they grow up in a culture where education is not highly valued. If I can't trust God in everything right now, how will I be able to trust in Him when things actually get tough?

I move in August 25th so after I get settled I will post pictures. Can't wait to make my trip to IKEA!

Moving Onward.

Praise the Lord that my parents safely arrived in Houston late Friday night. It was nice to spend some more time with them away from the busyness that seems to be associated with being at home. Even during my last few days at home it seemed like we didn't get to talk much because they were occupied with church matters. I appreciate the fellowship that we're now able to have now and will miss being able to do that on a more regular basis.

The last couple days have been a blur, there isn't much you can do when you don't have a car so I've been watching a lot of TV shows. I'm all caught up on Rookie Blue now and am watching the second season of Downton Abbey. Jessica and I went to go workout at the UH gym the other day which was fun, I think it's smaller than the IMA but it's still a very nice gym. I start work tomorrow and am a bit anxious because I'm not sure what to expect so pray for me as I transition into working life.

Brother Dale shared a message with us today about moving onward that I feel fits perfectly with what I'm experiencing right now. God is a God of movement and He is constantly moving forward towards the completion of His perfect plan. We have been called like Abraham to come out of our present situation and move onward with the Lord, to be sojourners towards a "city which has foundations, whose architect and builder is God (Heb 11:10)". We have a choice as to whether or not we want to obey this calling but the only way to please the Lord is to follow the path He has set before us, a path of self-denial and selflessness. I'm not yet able to fully comprehend what the Kingdom is but I know that the Lord is working in my life so that I can learn this lesson of moving forward so that one day I may be fit for His Kingdom.

After my parents left today I was reflecting upon why I am here in Houston. I know that it is the Lord that gave me this fellowship opportunity but I've been struggling with what my purpose here is besides my job. It's never easy/fun being in a new group, especially one that is so large, and I'm not an extroverted person making it hard to meet people. The Lord has truly blessed me over these past years with a comfortable life. I never imagined myself to be somewhere so far away from home; and yet, He has called me out of my comfort zone and has asked me to move forward in the direction He has set before me. I have to admit that I was reluctant to move forward but Brother Dale's message reminded me today that my walk with the Lord needs to constantly be moving forward, it can not be a stagnant one. Sometimes the Lord needs to physically move us so that our spiritual life will also be able to move forward.

I hope that I don't come across as saying that I couldn't grow spiritually in Seattle, because I have...I believe that we all have grown this past year...but maybe I have been too blessed by you guys that I am not actively pursuing after the Lord as I should; I have forgotten what it means to rely on Him in all matters. Over these last few days, in a foreign environment, I have already been forced to turn to Him in even the smallest matters. I know it's silly but not having a car has been very inconvenient...especially with working out...but as I brought that matter before the Lord I was reminded that I still had WCCC messages to catch up on which are definitely more beneficial to my spiritual life. My prayer is that the Lord may continue show me His will for me while I'm here so that I can continue to grow in my walk with Him.

Luke 9:61-62
Another also said, “I will follow You, Lord; but first permit me to say good-bye to those at home.” But Jesus said to him, “ No one, after putting his hand to the plow and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.”

It is clear to me that it was the Lord that called me to leave Seattle and although I am not sure why He has brought me here I must learn to follow after Him wholeheartedly without looking back. He has always proven Himself to be faithful and I know that by His mercy and grace I can face tomorrow.

Sorry that this post has been text heavy...hopefully I'll have more exciting things to share tomorrow after my first day! Hope that Seattle weather is treating you guys well. :)

Settling in.

Praise the Lord that I'm adapting to Houston life quite well. As long as I stay indoors most of the time the weather isn't too bad, I do miss being outside to enjoy the sun though. Hopefully things will cool down in the next few months and I'll be able to be outside without feeling like I've walked into a sauna. Here are a few pics that I've managed to take, I'm not used to having to take picture because usually someone else has that area covered.  

 Trail that I went running on in the morning by the bayou...pretty sure I was the only non black person there. 

I went at 7 in the morning and I was already sweating like crazy, I can only imagine what Michael would be like :p

 A sample of the houses that are around the area I'm in right now. There are some really nice ones like this and then some not so nice ones. 

The car that the Yong's have so graciously allowed me to drive. Honestly, it's the first time that I've driven this size of a car on the highway but it has been fun. I'm slowly finding my way around here but I'm probably still going to invest in a GPS. 

 Living at Tim's aunt's place is quite interesting because they rent out some of their rooms to international students. The house has been quite empty during the days because most of them are still finishing up summer school so I have to entertain myself. We try to eat dinners together and I'm mentally exhausted afterwards because the conversations are always in fast-pace Chinese. It's okay though because Jessica's Chinese is worse than mine. :)

I do miss Seattle a lot. As kind as the people are here at HCA it still feels weird to go to prayer meeting and not see you guys. I'm sure it'll get easier but for now I'm still just the new girl. 

I should be finalizing an apartment soon so I'll keep you guys updated, then you guys can come visit me!

This is it.

It's 11:52 PM, August 5, 2012. In about 12 hours I am going to be on a flight to Houston to face a year of uncertainty. I know that I've had time to process this but reality has only begun to sink in. Never did I think that I would end up in Houston. I am not the adventurous type and would much rather stay at home but clearly the Lord has a different plan for me. I do not know what is in store for me this next year but I am confident in Him who holds my tomorrow and I am confident that His power will be made perfect in my weaknesses because His grace has always been sufficient for me. Looking back on this past year I can only give praise to the Lord for all that He has blessed me with. Many times we don't understand what the Lord is doing in our lives but given a chance to reflect we see how our trials and sufferings actually became a way for Him to bless us. I hope that in this next year I will be able to share about both the good and bad that I encounter and even more so I hope that I will be able to share about His many blessings in my life.

Sometimes I look at how far our group has grown both as individuals and as a family and I have a hard time believing that it's only been four years. Thank you all for the wonderful fellowship and memories that have been created and I pray that the Lord may continue to do His good work here at SCA. I will see you all soon! :)